Sometimes I Get Hungry #06 [Raining Blood Edition]

Image10-30-2013

Not sure if it was penance… It sure felt like it. Do you know what it feels like to listen to fifty or sixty “Raining Blood” remixes? Not to mention the majority of them were Trap or Dubstep, and not very good ones, at that. Is that an oxymoron? Guess the question really should be, ‘Is it abuse if you do it to yourself?’

It started innocently enough, too. I’ve always been a proponent of having the greatest variety of remixes. I’ve got an affinity for new visions of my favorite songs. When I thought about what special treat I was gonna give y’all on my most favorite of holidays, I wanted to go the traditional route of Screamin’ Jay Hawkins or anything with the word ‘Zombie’ in the title. I even considered tracks featuring samples from favorite Horror movie classics (Hi, Figure), but that felt unintentionally sarcastic, like trying to gum a lion to death. You don’t come here for the typical slapstick. You come here because you’re hungry. You come here because I try not to feed you the same tired gruel. So, in all the glory of my arrogance, I decided to serve up the greatest metal song of all time, in remix form. The monstrous lords of Thrash probably laughed from on high and continued to laugh throughout my folly. They laughed every time that holocaust opening trickled into my ears. They laughed when the distortion was handled by a overzealous music maker, trying to “Rage Out” the pentecostal symphony of frets. I’ve been their punch line since the beginning of the month, which was when I started on this idea. To them, I was just another libertine ready for “120 Days of Sodom”. They could check back on me whenever. I knew they needed to fulfill their perverse whims.

So I took it. Every single siren effect. Being informed, mid-song to put my hands up or the bloated “DJ SO AND SO” right before a spatial vector of timing. I subjected myself to these atrocities for weeks. Everyday, some slight attempt at escaping the horror of my decision with the hope that I would find one good remix. The perfidious beasts torturing me with a new musical flagellation. I never thought I could hate “Raining Blood”, but I almost did. It almost happened.

They couldn’t break me, though. After hearing every sloppy, amateur cliche EDM remixers had to offer, I came out with an extra song past target. It would have even been five if the artist had gotten back to me in time. So I hope you enjoy my hours of misery more than I did. You now have some of the best songs for your duct taped, cardboard haunted houses.

Image

Slayer – Raining Blood (SEXISTALK UGLY RE-EDIT)

Image

Been camping on this song since 4/19/2010. At least that’s what the file origin reads out as. Coincidentally, that day also happens to be my mother’s birthday. What I’ve always found striking is the 4/20 connection, and I don’t mean the whole blowing trees, hippy nonsense. Columbine shootings, the Deep Horizon oil rig causing an oceanpocalypse, Fukushima power plant shutting down. It’s also the day my mom died, but that’s another post for another day… This version has a Hard Electro, max headroom, Fidget quality. Although this was my favorite of this song’s remixes for some time, it might be considered dated to anybody whose seen the formulaic changes of the EDM scene of the last eight years. The guitars stay intact. Even the vocal slips in and out at authentic measures. It’s also been the song I’ve used to introduce all my Headbanger friends to the dark side of this era of music. Anybody who talks about Viovod and Misanthropic ends up hearing this kneeslapper and always  asks me afterwards, “ Do you have anymore songs like this?” To which I respond, “Yes, I do. Why don’t you come with me… and maybe trim that disgusting System of a Down-Syndrome neckbeard, while we’re here.”  Soon enough, they’re inviting me to Steve Aoki shows. I’m sorry I did that to you, bro. I know that feel.

https://soundcloud.com/sexistalk/slayer-raining-blood-sexistalk-ugly-reedit
Slayer – Raining Blood (SEXISTALK UGLY RE-EDIT)

Peter Murphy- Subway [Eddie Bravo/ Mr. Denizen Raining Blood Remix] REMASTERED VERSION

Image

When I heard this remix I immediately said, “It sounds like Bauhaus.” Then I saw that It said Peter Murphy and I said to myself, “Shut up, stupid.” As for being a remix, I’m not quite sure about that. It’s a remix of a reimagining… did I say that correctly? The premise was most likely inspired by the our most Holy of Unholy songs, but it’s not a direct spawn of it. To be a modernista, you’ll love it if you’re a fan of Imagine Dragons and Sbtrkt remixes. Either way, the raw beauty lies deep within. It’s unfair to call this Goth or Witch House, because it’d be a hokey point-at description. It may be the most proficient in terms of creativity, of these slew of remixes. The rain is spliced into static; controlled pandaemonium is the best way to describe this. I enjoyed it and wouldn’t share it with you if I didn’t. Surely, the Heavy Metal dude, who just got turned onto electronic music, will have a black lipstick, Victorian lace wearing girlfriend who’d love this one. And so, we welcome another one to our ranks, muahahahaha.

https://soundcloud.com/eddie-bravo/peter-murphy-subway-eddie-1
Peter Murphy- Subway [Eddie Bravo/ Mr. Denizen Raining Blood Remix] REMASTERED VERSION

Slayer – Raining Blood (Angster Hardstyle Remix) [Ft Renard]

Image

Now, Hardstyle is something I’m not a fan of…. Doesn’t mean I dislike it either. Its 174 B.P.M. jab in the face doesn’t make my Techno inner child happy… not at all… As a matter of fact, it turns me into Seymour from ‘Ghost World’. However, the opening Super Nintendo boss fight soundtrack, does. I definitely appreciate the low end exit of the song, and found myself disappointed that it didn’t go on any farther. That’s my issue with Hardstyle… The departures are too quick or so repetitive that it’s impossible to get into that Golden 3:14 timing I’ve come to know and love. I’m sure a minute and a half is an eternity for some Hardstyle enthusiasts, and it’ll probably win over the distant cousin of the Metal guy and Goth girl I mentioned above. You know, late Nineties, Korn lover with a ‘People=Shit’ forearm tattoo (if you don’t know that guy, look down at your forearm… Yeah… It’s you). We’ll see you at the next DJ Bl3nd (there’s supposed to be a three in that, right??? Like Dead-mou-five?) show… well… you won’t see me there, but I’m sure you’ll have the time of your life .

https://soundcloud.com/angster/raining-blood-angster
Slayer – Raining Blood (Angster Hardstyle Remix) [Ft Renard]

Slayer – Raining Blood (Aylen Remix)

Image

Last on the list, but definitely a strong finish. Aylen has been popping up on a lot of trap mixes and recommendations, and I’m not going to lie, genre babies typically turn me off. I can’t say that about him. Cognizant respect for the original wins major points here. Where the earlier entries found difficulty in managing fluidity between transition and pitch, this version has none of the problems. The screeching outro riffs of the original were a factor with all the entries. Not this one. Aylen’s remix hits closest to Fundamental Dubstep of any sorts, at least from I’ve heard in some time- and I’m saying that in the most gentlemanly way possible. A quick opening with an immediate charge into the arpeggios, featuring snarling drums and tactical effect work, which easily transcends into the last final half of the song. Who’s this for? It’s for that moment when asked, “Do you have any Trap, bro?” Only a high end player will be able to handle this track, but  you’ll watch those newbie faces dart back and forth in despair. This is like Ghostrider’s ‘Perdition Stare’. You’ll see the years absolve on the faces of those who will finally realize how much music they need to catch up on.

 https://soundcloud.com/aylen/slayer-raining-blood-aylen
Slayer – Raining Blood (Aylen Remix)

Matador- Say It Isn’t So (original mix)

Image

It’s no Raining Blood Remix, but I’m sure you need a palette cleanser after all that metallic residue in your ears. Besides, being this weeks audible fixation, I always get super excite when Dublin’s Matador releases something new. With an austere opening, cloaked levels of High and Low breaks, and a seductive minimal foray, this is the perfect reset for your internal metronome. Early on, or late set selection, this song has quickly gained spots on my favorite lists of this year.

https://soundcloud.com/matador_official/matador-say-it-isnt-so
Matador- Say It Isn’t So

 Vinyl Porn:

 Disclosure

 A book will always be an esteemed and privileged artifact, in my eyes. Books seem to grow with the person that reads it. Stories absorbing tears, spittle from laughter, and sometimes even your blood (shit happens). Pages turn scarred from getting it thrown back in your face after a vicious break up… Sometimes they’re kept out of spite, only to be returned years later, after all the malcontent goes away. Only the memories are left behind in those pages, along with its story. I will always pick an actual book with pages that I can turn over an electronic reader, and I’ll always love vinyl over any other medium. Every once in a while, I’ll post up something to look out for or pre-order if I learn about it early enough.

Image

 Disclosure has been the runaway train of this year. As cool as you probably think you are if you were listening to them in December of last year, I was never enamored with “When A Fire Starts To Burn” as I was with their tune, “F For You”. It’s my favorite track from Latch, and I jumped at the chance to get this the moment I saw it was available for purchase. Now, all I have to do is upgrade to getting my record player back from my ex, and not just a bunch of torn up books.

 Buy Disclosure – F For You (12″ Vinyl) via Disclosure’s online store here:

http://store.disclosureofficial.com/home/f-for-you-12.html

That’s it for this week’s S.I.G.H. I would like to thank everybody again for your readership. Next week: I return the favor, just no kissing afterwards…

Article By
Raul Chacon

 Please direct any questions or inquiries to
VashChacon@yahoo.com
with “Sometimes I Get Hungry” in the subject heading.

Raul Chacon is a self aware douchebag, who only listens to artists you’ve probably never heard of. His years of writing for literary reviews and magazines, lead him to a couple of scholarships for his work, which he quickly squandered by moving to Austin and going to shows six days a week, instead of class. Eventually, he became as a touring security and witnessed hundreds of shows and dozens of festivals firsthand. He would tell you how many shows he’s been too; but there’s too many holes in his brain at this point.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s